3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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