i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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