then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
