Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
