I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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