She said her name was "party"
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
