Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize
