he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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