Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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