im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Randomize