i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
