I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
