sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Do vagina's smell?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
