I can tuck mytits in my pants
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
