Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
