cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize