You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
