in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
