just come out here and I will go home with you...
no, he came in my armpit
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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