He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
