Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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