is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
