i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I love you. Go after that dick
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
