Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I think my moral compass just broke
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