Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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