after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
