Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
