Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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