I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
