i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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