...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize