its not stalking. its research.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Randomize
