I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
