he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
