Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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