I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
