honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
