I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
