He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
