I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
