I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
