I'm sorry my penis didn't work
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Randomize
