Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
