Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
