how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
