For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
