Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
