So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
