Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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