She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
